I know you've all been waiting for this one: True life captions from our actual life. These really all happened. Some are funny, some are tender, some are, well, painfully honest. I hope you at least get a laugh out of it! You'll probably notice that one particular child happens to be in the center of most of these stories.
When I say my kids are 'climbing the walls', I just may mean it literally.
On rare occasions, you can get compliments about your children in public. One such occurrence happened while we were at dinner at a restaurant. Now, this was AFTER getting pictures taken. Three separate people (two patrons, one server) complimented us on our “well-behaved” children and our “beautiful family”. Ah, it’s the little things.
Normal crazy time. :)
Aaawww...how cute (insert sarcasm here)! My 2 and 4 year olds were playing so cute together downstairs! ... Too bad that involved about 10 Board games, 2-3 puzzles, various playing cards and two bags of Christmas bows all mixed together on top of the pool table....
KM had a ball under her shirt--her "baby". It fell out and she said, "My baby fall out!" I asked her if it was a boy or a girl and she said, "No, it a ball!" I should have known.
If you are missing something and have kids, go check in their bike seat. Just found the TV remote in TD's seat of his bike. We had been missing it for several days.
KM and TD have a ritual of watching CD and SB walk to the bus stop while yelling “bye” the whole time. Now, my 2 year old yells after her 6 and almost 8 year old siblings to "watch out for cars" as well.
And this is really how KM fell asleep.
KM was saying the prayer for lunch today. I wonder what exactly the "cackle" she made in the middle of her prayer meant exactly...it would help if the words she were saying were not in broken English.
Little 6 year old, SB, started crying on her way to the bus stop. I asked what's wrong and she said "I'm really going to miss you while I am at school." What a sweet girl.
Nothing says "I love you, mom" like getting pooped on by your newborn.
First thing done this morning: made juice and gave KM a cup full. Second thing done: Cleaned up the remaining full pitcher of juice from in, under and in front of the fridge.
While doing some kind of balancing act on her chair and table whilst holding her cup of smoothie, KM had a miscalculation.
I was telling CD that he didn't have to get baptized if he didn't want to (in our church, we get baptized at the age of 8). And he was surprised. And I said it's your choice whether you want to or not. He then said to me, "And Mom, just to let you know, I want to get baptized." Love these moments.
What you can't tell from this picture is that there actually is a frisbee under KM's bottom.
I was telling my husband all of the "wonderful" things KM had done that day, one of which was getting into/destroying some of my make-up, and she said "Naughty KM. Get in Mommy's make-up." Well, at least she knows.
KM loves to bring up all of her ouches—weeks after they have happened. One particular time, she had a small scrape on her back from falling off of a wagon. She came up to her daddy and said, “I have a owie on my back.” You do? “Yeah. I need to go to the chiropractor.” Then I got accused of coaching her (which I didn’t!)
I'm raising readers--in case you couldn't tell.
One night SB was crying in her bed. I asked her why she was crying. She said, “I’m just sad that all of the people that were alive before Jesus won’t be able to come alive again!” I told her that they will because everyone will be resurrected. “They will?!” she says as she immediately stops crying.
SB was crying in her bed once again, sad that she won’t be able to take all of her things with her when she dies. And, she will miss her things.
After CJ was born, we were leaving the hospital and one of the nurses was holding TD’s hand as we walked out. She asked, “Are you 4?” and Ty answered, “Yes, and I am going on a mission!” I love the growing testimonies of children!
So I made sandwiches for dinner--ham, cheese, tomato. (The hubby was gone and the kids wanted that.) KM just wanted a peanut butter sandwich. Well, then she hands me her top slice of bread and asks for mustard. I tell her no--that's gross. I give her another slice of bread with mustard on it, which she promptly adds to her peanut butter sandwich. "Yummy!" she says.
After finishing finals week, my sister, her friend, and SB and friends’s daughter went out for dessert. After dessert, we get in the car to go (our girls in their pajamas), SB exclaimed, “Are we going to the opera now?”
You ever have one of those nights? I guess TD has.
KM was throwing around her attitude and I remarked that I was scared of what she was going to turn into as she gets older. SB, trying to be funny, says, "I think she's going to be a mean Mom like you!" Ouch. She did come up after being tucked in, with tears in her eyes, to say that she was sorry and didn't mean it.
I had been doing the laundry all day...just found a FRISBEE in the washer. That was a first.
KM: "Daddy, I want a spider to eat Mommy!"
I was talking to TD tonight about his day and I told him I thought he was a neat kid. He put down his drink and was hugging me and I asked him what he was thinking. His answer? "Crocodiles eat us."
Last night we were reading scriptures and we let CD and SB read some. We were amazed to hear SB (6 years old) to breeze over words like wherefore, abridgment Lamanites, prophecy, revelation, thereof, and remnant (well, okay, she said rememnant, but still!).
I was waking up KM this morning for preschool and she said, while rubbing her eyes, "My eyes are broken!" Later she told Dad the same thing and added, "Yeah, and I fix them!"
Apparently, TD has much faith in his mother's healing skills. He said to me yesterday (while being told no more candy!), "I don't care if I get sick, you can feel me better!"
KM just came upstairs and said to me, "Mom I can't go to sleep because my hair is all crappy."
Probably the cutest way to start your morning? Getting raspberries blown on your arm and stomach by your one-year-old and listening to him giggle.
CJ asleep. Comfy, no?
Last night tucking in the girls:
KM: "Mom, how come we never watch pee and poo?"
Me: "What? How come we never watch pee and poo? Because it's gross."
KM: "But I want to watch pee and poo."
SB: (giggling) "She means Winnie the Pooh."
Me: "Oh! You mean Winnie the Pooh?"
K: "Yeah. We never watch that."
KM: "Mom, rub my forehead and see what happens."
Me: (rubbing it)
KM: "Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. See? It hurts inside my forehead."
This girl kills me.
SB (crying): "Mom, I'm just feeling sad because I don't want CJ to grow up."
SB (7yrs): "KM won't play with me. She just keeps walking away."
KM (4yrs): "Well, Sorry."
SB: "You're acting like a teenager, KM!"
Partners in crime, partners in nap time.
Me (attempting to get out of the car while VERY pregnant): "Ugh. I'm so fat."
CD (my oldest): "Well, at least you're not fat in real life."
KM-isms while at McDonald's playing (for TD's birthday):
KM: "I'm getting tired from this busimess." (pronounced with the 'm')
She comes up, grabs an apple slice and says, "I need this to keep me going". Now for the no words obscenity: She got a Zooble (some little toy that is a ball, but turns into a pet-looking thing). She was storing it in her stretchy pants--at first on her side, but then it ended up in front. Yep, she looked like she was male.
KM: "Is this dress my size?"
Me: "Yes, but you need to wear a shirt under it because it's not modest." (sleeveless and practically shows her chest).
KM: "I can do whatever I want with myself!"
KM: "When Dad saved you, did you like him?"
Me: "Saved me from what?"
KM: "Uh, the tower."
SB: "KM thinks everyone is a princess before they get married."
I'd like to think I live a fairy-tale life!
After buying a new bathing suit, I had the girls try them on to make sure they fit well and appropriately. KM said, "I look cute, and I look modest!" (Whew! What I'm teaching is sinking in!)
We like to do fun things--this is us after winning 2nd place in the Red Wagon Parade for the boat and water skiing float we made.
We were talking about how SM is losing all of her hair. CD says that pretty soon she isn't going to be a mammal any more.
Me: "A mammal???"
Cooper: "Yeah, mammals have hair."
Too funny, my kids. Too funny.
Me: "TD, why are you wearing shorts?"
TD: "Because it's Spring."
Yeah, but it's still below freezing!!!
Kindergarten registration today for KM. She, of course, knew everything she was supposed to (and CJ knew half of it too--kept answering the correct letters on the flashcards. So hilarious!).
CD photo-bombing SB's picture before her first ballet class.
You know how little girls always undress their Barbies or other dolls, but can't redress them? It's the same with boys, except they take the tires off of their cars and can't get them back on.
My 7 year old just rode his bike off the back of a trailer. I'm not sure which hurts worse: his pride--or his face?
Just a few minutes is all it takes for a 3 year old to take his poopy diaper off and take his 1 year old sister's diaper off and to make a holy mess. I'll let you imagine the rest.
I was just helping CJ say the prayer at lunch--telling him what to say and he repeats--but he slipped in a line of his own: "Help my butt to get better."
I was changing CJ's diaper and he says, "Look at my Big Black Butt!" ???? Where do they get these things?? Only thing I can think is it was because of the ahem, mess, on his bottom?
KM's blanket + hot fireplace.
I'm officially old. KM says: "Mom, we're you alive when this happened? It was WAY back then."
So funny! SM won't drink her cup, go to sleep, etc without her hand in someones shirt--it's so odd. But, right now, she is walking around drinking her sipper cup with her hand down her own shirt!
4 of my kids are downstairs right now watching two spiders victimize an earwig. Listening to them is hilarious. One of the things I heard was them chanting "Fight, Fight, Fight, Fight!"
This note was written by TD when he was 4 years old. Can you read it? He was mad that he couldn't have pop, thus, "Giv Me Pop."
My 7 year old is quite the puzzle. When I was forcing him to read his take-home book, he informed that he doesn't like reading "made-up" stories, he only like real ones. He's a non-fiction man. Add this to the fact that he does not want to be in orchestra or choir, and I'm thinking I have a very left-brained child.
Thought we had lost our cat to predators, when in reality the predator was a certain 3 year old boy who locked him into a tool compartment beneath the camper... filthy and hungry. All is better now.
So last night, while trick or treating, my kids were crazy loud. Keeping with the theme, I told them they were going to wake the dead zombies. This worried KM. She later said,
"Mom, I'm feeling ominous." Ominous?
SB: "I don't even know what that means."
KM: "It means that you feel like something is coming or that something scary is going to happen."
What happens when you leave a 1 year old in your bathroom for one minute? She eats your eye shadow.
CJ: "I'm scared of the Tookie Guy."
Me: "The Cookie Guy?"
CJ: "Yeah, the Tookie Guy. He comes in our house and disappears."
Me: "Why are you scared of him?"
CJ: "Because he scares me." (me still trying to figure out who he is talking about)
Me: "Why? Does he take all of your cookies?"
Me: "Does he hurt anyone?"
CJ: "No. He takes all the tookies and he scares me. Monster Tookie Guy."
Me: "Cookie Monster? From Sesame Street? That's blue?"
CJ: "Yeah. He scares me. He comes in our house."
Hmmm....Sesame Street Monsters. Scary, indeed.
Photo by Nicole Christiansen Photography
That's us above. We're all crazy, but I love it. I wouldn't trade my kids for anything. I am so grateful to be entrusted with these little spirits!
© Wendy 2012